I. Need.

Vanity. It’s an odd vice isn’t it. We’re all guilty of it. I mean for God himself* to have made it one of the seven deadly sins, there must be something to it. But what is it for? I need affirming. By you. You feed me. I need your approval. I. Need.

And here we are. I write in the hope that you will read. That you will create with me a connection that means that at some point we both gain something. But what is my writing for? A desire to be praised? To be recognised as someone who has an opinion in his field. Dare I say, to be a thought leader? Well, dammit yes. I. Need.

Which leads me to some recent realisations. I’ve enjoyed a lot of events this year. A chance tweet from Sarah Durbs, turned into a joint venture with Natasha Stallard to deliver an awesome piece of work under the guise of Altruistic HR. That was awesome. A group of us came together and formed L&D Connect, and decided to hold the first unconference for the L&D community. Lots of great stuff happened as a result of that, and by God it made me proud. HRD12 by the CIPD was particularly enjoyable this year as I got to enjoy the whole event from the perspective of an official blogger. And along the way, good things have been happening on Twitter, and with family. All things that have helped me on a journey.

It came to a point some weeks back where I wanted to achieve something else. For me. A sole venture to test my resolve. What could I achieve? Now there is the question to hold yourself to account for. What could I achieve? I decided I needed to hold a public event, where people would spend time with me, and I help them develop their knowledge on a fringe topic. I had to be careful that it wasn’t work related, that it would be cleanly detached from work commitments, and I could be free to go forth at my will. And so Positive Psychology in Application was born.

My goal here is to prove that I can do this. I have an ambition to one day deliver a TED talk, or a Do Lecture. I also have an ambition to help others understand more about Positive Psychology. It’s such a rich field full of insight into the human condition that I want as many people to know about it as possible. I’ve studied it a fair bit, practise it where I can, and help others to understand it through my blog, and even talks at work. I get it, and want others to get it.

I’ve set myself a fair target. I want 150 people to attend. I’m charging for the event as I want to hold it at a decent event space, and create a sense of commitment from people wanting to attend. The pound signs aren’t important though. What’s important is that I make this happen. For me. I. Need.

There’s no call to action here. I could provide a link to the Eventbrite page, but that’s tacky. It screams desperation. Instead I’m going to be better than that. If you follow me on Twitter, you’ll have seen that I tweet about the event daily. I’m also sending out emails, and getting in touch with potentially interested people directly. There’s interest out there. It just needs to be nudged in my direction.




*Allegedly. Also, not entirely true, as its a bi-product of pride. According to Christian lore.

I’m totally being hypocritical and linking to the Eventbrite page so you can get your asses over there and booking 🙂

Published by

Sukh Pabial

I'm an occupational psychologist by profession and am passionate about all things learning and development, creating holistic learning solutions and using positive psychology in the workforce.

7 thoughts on “I. Need.”

  1. Not entirely sure I connect vanity with “I Need”, but nonetheless a thought provoker. Have a sneaking suspicion that I will be asking people what they need a bit more often this week.

    1. Glad to have you stop by and taking the time to comment. My guess is we probably do ask what people need. Do we hear it though or make assumptions or dismiss it or are we able to meet their needs?

  2. Great blog, thank you. I agree and I. Need too. I had a conversation yesterday morning with a client who was apologising for having a desire to do a role that means something to them and gives them a real feeling of purpose and allows them to be at their best. At first they were apologetic about it saying

    ‘I should be happy with what I have got and not asking or wanting any more. Others would be happy with what I have got.’

    My response was that may be true and still if you are feeling unfulfilled then you need to listen to that. On some level you are telling yourself that something needs to change for you to feel happy. I. Need.

    Needing is natural, acceptable and I think should be encouraged. Maybe we need a new hash tag #I.Need

    1. I really like this Phil. There’s something there in helping people to hear what their need is, and discerning if it’s the right time to listen to it, or if they need to explore options. Thanks for stopping by.

  3. I have a few things I want to get started too, so I enjoyed this post Sukh. Working with you and the crew on L&D Connect and crowdsourcing the story for #connectinghr have connected me back to ‘making things happen’ – something I really enjoy doing 🙂 Pleased you included the link to your event = you should be proud to promote it because it’s going to be good!

    1. That’s what I forgot Martin, I am proud to be doing this event, and Doug and you have helped me to reconnect to that.

      Yes, making things happen is jolly motivating and the more we can help others on the same journey, all the better.

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