Being your best self at work

Us L&Ders, we talk a foreign language most of the time. It’s all about personal development, self awareness, learning, skills, competencies, and more. It’s a language unique to the profession, and often needs explaining to the other parts of the business. We’re not the only ones guilty of that. Marketing have their communications, PR and messaging. Operations have their opportunity cost, rate cards and utilisation targets. Sales have their… erm… sales targets?

In a post not long ago, I wrote about soft skills not being soft, and Meg Peppin wrote a post about how we’re not pink and fluffy.

Let’s follow this through a bit.

I want and believe can be their best self. But what is that? Be your best self. It’s such an alien phrase in everyday language, and doesn’t mean a lot to most people. What do you mean be my best self? Is my current self not good enough? And what is my best when I don’t even know what looks like? How do you know what my best is when you don’t even know me?

All valid questions, and none with easy answers.

So I’m going to share this with y’all. I find it hard to be my best self.

I’d like to think I’m highly self-aware. That is, I have a fair understanding of what I’m good at, what I’m not, what motivates me, what irks me, where my strengths lie, and where my weaknesses are. I’m still learning all of that, I’m just at a point in my life where my understanding about all of that for myself is at a good place. There’s not much more I want to or need to explore, yet.

Being my best self for me means being helpful to others, and considerate to their needs. It’s about finding ways to do those things I enjoy, and are positive in nature, which help others. It’s about helping others to do what they want, positively, and with little hindrance from others. It’s about sharing what I know with others to help them understand more about themselves.

This shit takes years to get right. I don’t care if you go through coaching, NLP, learning events, education, or meditation. It’s all good and useful. As long as it’s positive and not harmful to the person.

I find it hard to maintain that level of right. I could do more for others in my life in every respect. I could do more for myself. I could do more for my employer. There’s always something to learn which is helpful, and always ways to make a positive difference in this world.

Being my best self means I need to find that flow which allows me to focus my energy in different ways with different parts of my life. My family need me to be one way with them, my friends another, my work another, and myself another. That concept of flow is the one to be mindful of. Flow is very fluid, and changes like the wind. What is important today isn’t important tomorrow. What’s important for me isn’t important for you. We all flow into and within and without each other.

So I have to find a way to help build flow for people at work, because that’s where these things tend to become manifest. If I’m in flow, and being my best self I’ll find ways to do my best work, and be a useful person in the organisation. I have to facilitate and guide people into and out of conversations which are useful and are positive. I want people to be their best self, while being mindful of who they are as a person.

Published by

Sukh Pabial

I'm an occupational psychologist by profession and am passionate about all things learning and development, creating holistic learning solutions and using positive psychology in the workforce.

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